Joke of the Day

Thought this was funny.. so I'm sharing

Little Red Riding Hood is skipping thru the forest road when she sees the big bad wolf crouched down behind a log. 'My,what big eyes you have, Mr. Wolf.'

The wolf jumps up and runs away.

Further down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again and this time he is crouched behind a bush. 'My what big ears you have, Mr. Wolf.'

Again the wolf jumps up and runs away.

About 1/4 mile down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again and this time he is crouched down behind a rock. 'My what big teeth you have Mr. Wolf.'

With that the wolf jumps up and screams, 'Will you knock it off, I'm trying to poop!'

[Jon]

Night Dark..

ROTFLMAO!



Dark Night..

[flipynifty]

ROFLMAO! lol *grinks* night dark *spanks gailen* dark knight?

i r like that one.

[Misguided]

ROFLMMFAO........

dark knight???

that some funny stuff right there

lol

lmfao

[gailenstryker]

lol and poor poor me *sniff*

[RogueTigeR]

ahahahahahahaha

haha.. very funny guys with your NIGHT dark, dark night stuff but post another joke would ya. And stop spanking Gailen, flipy ..... that be my job !

1. When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let
him keep her.

2. By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you
get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

3. "Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go
to a restaurant two times a week. A candlelight dinner, soft music and
dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."

4. "I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the
second one didn't."

5. You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.

6. My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

7. A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he
received hundreds of letters. They all said the same thing: "You can
have mine."

8. First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

How to Make a Woman Happy

It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:

1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynaecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate

WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:

45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:

54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes



HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

1. Show up naked
2. Bring food

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

1. Show up naked
2. Bring food

3. Agree with everything we say.

Two little skunks called In and Out were playing in the woods.
Out went home, and his mother said, "Where's In?, go and get him, there's a good boy."
So Out went back into the woods and returned shortly with his brother. "That's a good boy," said Mother skunk, "How did you find him so quickly?" "Easy," said the little skunk, "In stinked ...."

There's another joke about 'In and Out' but I fergetted it..

[Jon]

Originally Posted by Ives

How to Make a Woman Happy

It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:

1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynaecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate

WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:

45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:

54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes



HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

1. Show up naked
2. Bring food

Self-centred and shallow...

[ferrec]

Originally Posted by Ives

How to Make a Woman Happy

It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:

1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. and on and on and on

Nah Ives. Not this one anyways.
Just be faithful and kind.

And tell me my tits are nice every once in a while.

[zenga]

Originally Posted by Ives

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

1. Show up naked
2. Bring food

you forgot my beer bits

[flipynifty]

hee hee

lol

What do dolphins and men have in common?

They say that they're intelligent but no one's been able to prove that yet.